On my team the men went out to walk around and possibly go to a cafe (culturally in the village there’s no women in the cafes, they sit and do work at home or go out together in groups not intermingling with the men unless that man is husband or children). One of the local men stopped myself and Bradon and invited us to get coffee or tea with him. We ended up talking to each other the best we could with language barriers and no translator. The guy did most of the talking as we sat and drank with the man and listened to him talk. Of which after awhile he broke down crying in front of us. He later explained what seemed like what he ended up crying over as he soon cried after explaining as well. We also ended up getting our drinks paid for while we were there somehow. I guess one of the guys working at the cafe bought our drinks and the mans drink we were talking to. I’m not certain if he is, but the guy invited us to follow him to what might of been his place of living as he changed shoes there. But there was no where to lay his head from what we saw. He invited us to follow him just to show the place that might of been his home or where he works. He had keys to the place and to let us use umbrellas that he handed to us as we walked and followed him in the rain. He invited us to eat with him but I didn’t want to eat without the ladies on our team so we kindly declined and he walked us all the way to where we were staying while also limping in pain and having to stop because of the pain. We did not tell him where we were staying at, word for sure traveled fast that Americans were in the village and staying there.
The following day I sat in one of the numerous cafes nearby and watched the soccer game with everyone in there. Manchester United vs Liverpool. I also briefly talked with one of the people working there asking what card games everyone was playing. He told me they are all their own card games, but eventually told me one of them that they were playing. So I ended up watching them at for a minute until it got a little too crowded for me as soon there was more than 20 people in the cafe and not enough seating. So I ended up leaving as I can’t do big crowds, but have been learning to grow in that.
Another time myself and Bradon went to the cafe again. I was going to try and jump in one of the card games I have seen them play but no one was playing any card games when we came in. Only when we went to leave with dinner for the team were everyone starting to play the card games. While we were first in there one guy started speaking to us it seemed like he was saying we need to buy drinks to be in there. Drinks being coffee and tea as Muslims don’t drink alcohol. I was going to get tea I was just waiting until the guy working there had a chance to relax a bit. As I went up to order, the guy who started talking to us ended up shaking my hand and introducing himself. So I told him my name. As I sat back down I he ended up asking where I was from by listing places off like San Francisco and New York. I told him Florida. So because of saying my name was Michael and I am from Florida he ended up playing Michael Jackson songs on the TV. During the conversation it seemed like he was autistic. Another guy in there looked at me and did one of the hand signals by his head signifying that the guy had mental things going on.
On one of the days we ended up meeting a guy while trying to see if there was an opportunity still for the ladies to help and do ministry by stacking wood as they ended up helping do on the 2nd day that we were here in Restelicë with the family that allowed us to rent 2 weeks worth of stay there. As the family lived within the same area in multiple houses. They ended up finishing however and the guy who came out invited us men to another cafe. Of which I ended up using a translation app that didn’t go so well and caused an embarrassing moment. I was trying to ask “how long have you lived in Restelicë” in Serbian on the Google translate app but because it was spelled “Restalice” it translated back into English as “how long have you lived in a real place”. It’s also the wording one of my squadmates said to choose when Google keyboard brought up the words and different spelling for Restelicë. Which, from now on I’m not naming the town or city that we will be in, next time I use that app. The ladies ended up getting to be welcomed into the home of one of the ladies they ended up being invited to on the 2nd day being there and had a follow up meet up. In Islam culture, being invited into one’s home is very sacred (intimate). The first time the ladies were invited into the home they were told that “they’re something special”.
The ladies went to their house for a 3rd time and played games and had good conversations. They were taught some of the local games that the family plays while they taught them some of the known US card games like Dutch blitz, slapjack, phase 10 and rummy. Check out my team’s blogs to find out more about there experience.
What an experience! Glad you are growing and willing to grow in different ways. Awesome nephew. Thanks for the updates!
What I truly love about this blog is that you put your activities in the cultural context. You taught me that the cafes are basically just for the men. Also, I didn’t know until I read this that inviting someone to your home is such a huge honor in that culture.